Gotta love your MIL

I just came from spending a couple hours with my Mother in law. I try to take baby A to see her when the cleaning lady is at my house or when I will be in her neighborhood, which is a comfortable twenty-some miles from my home. I left today, as I often do, with a headache.

Now don't get me wrong, I love my MIL. She is a very warm and loving mother (along with controlling and extremely opinionated, but that's to be expected I suppose.) A typical Jewish mother, except a younger and more attractive version of what you would picture.

The thing is, like many Grandmothers, she is constantly offering her opinion but in such a way that it sounds like she is saying I am a bad mother. My husband says that I am just sensitive and imagining it, but I don't think so. She made a comment today about the shoes baby A is wearing. A has a little runny nose and it seems like she is either possibly teething or getting a little cold and somehow, some way, it's like she is in a competition with me to diagnose A first. Every time I tell a story that I think she would truly enjoy about A's development (like her new obsession with reading the same book over and over and over) she has to try to one-up me! Yes, my MIL taught A to clap her hands. That's awesome! I'm psyched! I totally give her credit! I am not all jealous and needing to try to take that away from her.

My MIL sees A twice a week on average. Somehow, though, it's like she needs to compete with me over who saw which milestones first. Seriously? I am with the child 24/7; you see her maybe 5 hours a week! It kills me when she says "OMG, you have to see what she just did; she was standing up all by herself and clapping!" Um, yeh, she's been doing that for a while now.

This isn't the case with my Mom at all. My Mom has never done anything remotely offensive or improper, or made any comments. This always seems to be the case; the MIL is the issue, never our own mother's. Why is that?

I know my MIL loves my daughter. She loves her like crazy! I just wonder why she can't enjoy her WITH me and not try to prove that she is a better mother than I am or something. I get it, you raised 3 kids. I respect you. Is it too much to ask for a little respect in return?